Florida Medical Cannabis Collective: T7|05: Florida’s Funkiest Strains – 11.15.2020

Gas, dank, funk, loud, stank, skunk – there’s at least half a dozen words to describe the type of strain that I’d say a majority of cannabis consumers really love, the kind that smells up the entire room within less than a minute after opening the container.

After nearly 2 years of building this website and the overall activism that surrounds it, I’ve reviewed dozens of strains. And one thing I’ve found, perhaps to the surprise of some: the type of strain that I describe above is not all that common in our current industry. This doesn’t mean that there isn’t great cannabis in Florida, because there is; there just seems to be more strains that have fruit, sweet, musky, etc. smells rather than that super loud, garlicky funk that many of us enjoy.

This isn’t just some petty “stoner” complaint, either: I’ve found that in almost all cases, those “loud” strains provide a higher quality of relief for my anxiety, depression, and PTSD than most all others do. There’s likely a good scientific reason for this: terpenes are a major component that give strains their unique smells, and each terpene also has its own unique medicinal properties as well. Assuming that these skunky strains have similar terpene profiles, it seems reasonable that they would also have similar medicinal benefits as well, especially if they have similar genetics.

With all that being said, I’ll link to my reviews of some of the loudest, gassiest, skunkiest, funkiest strains I’ve found to date, in no particular order. I’ll also write a short summary of my experiences with each strain, for the TLDR readers.

Note: I haven’t yet been able to try any products from the following MMTCs: RiSE, One Plant, Harvest, Colombia Care, The Botanist, The Flowery, and Perkins Nursery.

As with all T7 posts, here is the music I’m listening to, and the product I’m medicating with as I write this piece.

Music:

Cannabis Product and Strain: GrowHealthy Jilly Bean 3 Flower

Florida’s Funkiest Medical Flower

MUV: RudeBoi OG

RudeBoi OG has that classic garlicky, skunky, piney funk. This strain smelled up my entire living room soon after I opened the container. As with many of these skunky strains, I found RudeBoi to be very relaxing, and good for my depression/anxiety/PTSD. Will definitely buy again in the future.

MUV: Triangle Kush

Like RudeBoi OG, Triangle Kush is an OG Kush phenotype/lineage. Ultimately, the two strains had very similar smells, tastes, and effects. Triangle Kush had perhaps a slightly more garlicky terpene profile.

Trulieve: Puck Yeah

The flower form of this strain has been MIA for some time now, which is unfortunate, as it was a patient favorite for many. Puck Yeah had an extremely pungent, almost obnoxious smell when opening the jar. I remember it as another strain that was great for anxiety and depression, and hope to see it come back around in the near future.

Trulieve: Skywalker OG

Image

This Mazar x Blueberry cross has been another patient favorite from Trulieve for some time now. The “loudness” of this strain is different from the others preceding it in this list. While it is still extremely pungent, the Blueberry lineage brings a fruity berry edge to the profile as well, in contrast with the more garlicky terpenes of the other strains. Regardless, the effects are similar to the others in this list, and I specifically remember Skywalker OG for consistently making my eyes turn red – something that is difficult to “achieve” for me.

VidaCann: King Dosi

King Dosi is one of current favorite strains from VidaCann. It also has a unique “loudness” compared to other strains on this list. I found King Dosi to have a more sweet, sour, hashy, almost chocolatey aroma. When ground up, however, the smell of fuel became the dominant one. The effects were similar to the other strains on this list as well. I usually always try to pick up an eighth of this one when it’s available.

VidaCann: Duct Tape

Duct Tape has been a patient favorite strain from VidaCann ever since they began producing flower in the flower cups of late 2018 and early 2019, before smokable flower was legalized. I remember Duct Tape for having one of the more difficult terpene profiles to describe. How much this strain stinks up my room has seemed to vary from batch to batch, but the almost-exotic terpene profile is consistently tasty, and the effects are always highly enjoyable.

MUV: Prophet

Prophet had a very classic, almost chemical skunk funk when I opened the jar. There was also a sweeter citrus element to the terpene profile, upon further inspection. While many of the strains on this list are considered indica or indica-dominant hybrid strains, Prophet was actually more sativa-dominant – though it was listed as a hybrid strain.

Fluent: “Atlas” (Durban Poison)

While Fluent’s unique take on strain names often sounds more like something out of a Harry Potter movie than anything cannabis-related, they do manage to produce good batches of flower from time to time. “Atlas” (their Durban Poison phenotype) was a great example of that, with an earthy and skunky funk that quickly smelled up the area upon opening the jar. Atlas is the only sativa on this list, and while its effects were different than any of the other preceding strains: very energizing and motivating, it still holds the commonality of being able to vanquish my symptoms of depression, anxiety, and PTSD. As with many things in cannabis, the differences in strains are often very nuanced – this is one of the many reasons I love working in this field!

GrowHealthy: Queso Perro

The wonderful “dog cheese” is a very popular strain from GrowHealthy, and you’ll be hard pressed to find a patient on social media who just hates this strain. Most patients love it, myself being one of them. Like other strains on this list, just how pungent Queso Perro is may vary from batch to batch. At its best, it presents a cheesy, piney, diesel funk that becomes much more powerful when the flower is broken down or ground up.

Closing Thoughts

This list is certainly not meant to be exhaustive or all-inclusive. I still have many, many strains and dispensaries left to try; this list is only based off of all the flower I have reviewed so far. It’s very likely that a future installment of the T7 Series will feature an updated version of this list.

If you have tried any strains not mentioned here, feel free to comment them and let us know why they deserve a spot on a future “gas strains” list! While I am limited in what I am able to try due to the current availability of MMTCs in the Northwest Panhandle, a road trip in the future may not be out of the question – so to all of you reading this who have access to the MMTCs I can’t try, let us know which of their strains are the skunkiest, and we’ll get them next time!

As always, I appreciate your reading this article, and hope that it was useful to you as a patient. May you continue to be healthy, wealthy, and prosperous as we prepare to end 2020 and head into the 2021 New Year!

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